Showing posts with label Personal Development. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Personal Development. Show all posts

Saturday, 13 May 2017

It Felt Like the Right Time to Do It - So I Did It


You know those periods you go through when all of a sudden you’re super productive?

All of a sudden you feel an urge to get things done, to step up a gear and move forward towards a goal that’s dear to you.

Last weekend (I’m writing this on Saturday, so it’s exactly a week ago) I started to watch videos by fellow bloggers, with the intention of learning from them. If they were doing this full time, then so could I - but how?

The reason I’ve been writing on here every day was because I wanted to take this writing business seriously. I told myself it was now or never. I was so close to deleting this blog but something inside me told me to give it one last shot. That’s when I decided to write 300 words a day. 

It was a way for me to create a writing habit. 

And it worked. 

But I needed to find a way to reach a wider audience.

That’s when I began to look for ways to move forward.

Saturday night I began to read You’re a Writer (so start acting like one) by Jeff Goins.

I finished it on Sunday morning, in a cafe, with my small white dog on my lap. Come to think of it, I must’ve looked not too dissimilar to James Bond’s Dr No, but I wasn’t planning world domination - at least not in that sense.

I realized one thing: I had to have a basic foundation. Well, I had a basic foundation - it was this blog, so I needed to go to the next stage.

I needed a website.

Come Monday morning I had a meeting with a friend, and he informed me of several options for creating a site. 

I should say that I’m not tech-savvy in the slightest. When it comes to computers and the inner-workings of the internet, I’m pretty clueless. (My mum showed me how to work an iPad.)

When I got home from the meeting, I continued to do some research… and then I plunged straight in to creating a website.

I’m pleased to announce that my website, gavinwhyte.org is now up and running. I’ve been working on it since Monday, and I will continue to tweak it here and there, but, as it stands, I’m pretty happy with it.

When you sign up to my monthly newsletter (which can be done when you visit my site, or you can simply click HERE and it will take you directly to where you input your name and email address), you’ll get a free copy of Memento Mori: A Sneak Peek into a Seeker’s Diary. I hope to see your name on my subscriber’s list, so we can keep in touch.

I haven’t decided whether or not to continue posting on here; I'm edging more towards giving my new site my full attention. We'll see.

So it’s a new chapter for me.

And I always welcome new chapters. There’s nothing like change to move things forward.

I hope you will continue on this journey with me, for I see nothing but a promising horizon ahead.

Oh, and if you have any blogging tips I'm all ears!









Friday, 12 May 2017

Doing This One Thing Can Make Life So Much Easier



So many of us are afraid of doing this one thing. Without it we get nowhere, or we get somewhere slowly; and the road was probably a treacherous one when it didn’t need to be that treacherous.

We’re afraid to do this one thing because we’re afraid of how we might look in the eyes of others - at least that’s one of the reasons we’re afraid to do it. 

It’s a pride thing. 

(Pride + Fear = Suffering alone when there’re 7 billion of us under the sky.)

Silly, really, not just because of the hefty numbers that are working in our favour, but because behind the eyes the other is exactly the same as you. It really is like looking in a mirror, once you bypass surface appearances. 

I’m digressing, but my point is there’s nothing to be afraid of by doing this one thing.

Okay, here it is. Here’s the one thing you can do today that can make life so much easier for yourself.

You can… ask for help.

There’s nothing new under the sun, as they say, so I’m sorry if you feel a little let down. 

Maybe I built it up too much…

But asking for help is so unbelievably effective! 

Not to mention helpful…

Whether it’s related to your current workload in the office; your turbulent relationship you feel trapped in; maybe you’re afraid to ask for help with something health-related (have you found a lump? A new mole? What is it? Go and ask and find out). Maybe there’s a form you need to fill out and you’ve no idea how to do it. It just feels too complicated and now you’re feeling anxious. Check online for instructions. Find an email address; a phone number.

We’re connected like never before, what with the internet and social media. Help is at our fingertips.

Ignore that voice in your head that feeds you scary what-if scenarios. I have that voice too. I put it in its place and it shuts up - until next time.

Here’s something to remember… the reason there’s help out there is because, most often than not, someone has gone through what you’re currently facing - or at least something similar.

And they made it out alive to tell the tale.

Who better to receive help from than the person who’s familiar (or even vaguely familiar) with the path you’re on and the obstacles you’re facing? 

Then you know you were never alone; for if there’s one thing not asking for help creates within, it’s a feeling of isolation and loneliness.

There’re too many of us for you to feel lonely. Reach out your hand and somebody, somewhere, will grab it. 

What I’ve found is that most of us like to help. It makes us feel good. We don’t help because it feels good or to feel good; we feel good for helping because when we help we're helping ourselves. We’re one and the same, remember?

Be nice to the person looking back at you in the mirror, and see how you feel.

So, please, if you’re feeling stuck, for whatever reason, reach out. There’re so many of us, at least one of us will be able to help you.

Even if it’s your truly. 

Please, get in touch by all means. I don’t bite…



Wednesday, 3 May 2017

300 Words a Day - #31: Be Honest with Yourself

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I’m aware I’m repeating myself here, but it was only when my dream came true did I realize I no longer wanted it.

Nobody could’ve changed my mind when I was on my quest. 

Getting a recording contract was my mission.

If somebody had’ve said, “What if you don’t actually want it?” I sincerely wouldn’t have been able to compute what they were saying.

The thought of not wanting it didn’t enter the equation. 

Why would it?

The thought of failing entered my mind loads of times, but that was through fear.

A thought that doubted why I wanted the dream to become a reality would’ve doubted everything I lived for, would’ve doubted the complete identity I had conjured up.

Talk about fear!

No, I never doubted my goal because I enjoyed making music too much.

So when the dream came true and we started gigging around the UK, and I found myself slipping further and further into a dark place, I knew something wasn’t right.

That question I had never asked needed to be asked.

One day, whilst sitting in my car, I asked myself, “What would it feel like, right now, if I stopped making music?”

I shut my eyes and pretended for about ten seconds how that would feel. 

It was as if an elephant had been lifted off of my chest and shoulders.

I took a deep breath and laughed. 

How light I felt!

I couldn’t believe it.

For nine years I had been allowing that elephant to grow, and when you’re feeding something every day, just like in Roald Dahl’s Esio Trot, you don’t see (or in my case, feel) the difference. 

Such a deep pit I had dug for myself.

Now I had to climb out, but nobody was willing to lend a ladder.




Tuesday, 2 May 2017

300 Words a Day - #30: You Can Do This!

Following on from the previous post…

So there it is, a nine-year quest condensed into a few 300-word posts. 

The chase was over. The fox had caught the rabbit.

It took patience, self-confidence, persistence, perseverance, determination, drive, stubbornness, hope, faith, imagination, creativity, self-belief, passion, joy, trust - all of that stuff, and more.

With all of that thrown into the mix I knew I could achieve what I had set out to achieve.

What a lesson that was.

Here’s what it taught me: 


We can do anything we put our mind to


Nothing new, right? But now I had evidence.

And that’s priceless.

It doesn’t take super powers to turn a dream into a reality. 

You really can do anything you put your mind to. If you stay focused and determined and believe in yourself, I’m telling you, you can do what you set out to do.

You will get mocked and people will try and shoot you down, as I have already forewarned. But use their remarks, their strikes - their weakness - and turn it into your strength.

That’s all that it is, their weakness. You remind them of what they’re afraid to do.

If you believe in yourself and I don’t believe in myself, then I’m either going to model you, envy you, or try and bring you down a notch, so we see eye to eye.

With people like that, it’s far easier for them to chip away at what you’ve built, so you end up at their level, rather than them finding the strength within themselves to reach your height.

It’s far easier for many of us to attempt to shrink someone who’s growing, rather than to grow ourselves.

Growth requires strength and courage.

As they say, life begins where our comfort zone ends.

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Saturday, 29 April 2017

300 Words a Day - #27: Your Very Own Show

Being stubborn might not be an attractive character trait, but it can prove invaluable to dreamers.

I was often told, “If everything got handed to you on a plate, it would lose its value.”

Being in hot pursuit of what we want, thinking about it on a regular basis, being unbelievably stubborn that we refuse to quit, even when it seems like the odds are stacked against us, often gives our lives added meaning, purpose and drive.

(We need to be aware, that if our dreams lose their meaning and attraction - which they might - that our lives maintain theirs. There is a very serious danger of that happening when we put all of our meaningful eggs in our dream basket.)

There’s something to be said for stubborn persistence.

It ignites a fire in the belly, and can get us through difficult legs of the journey we’ve embarked upon.

If we’re on our death bed and our persistence hasn’t paid off, then at least we know we tried. We still didn’t fail. It might become clear at that point, anyhow, that it was all about the process, the journey, not the destination.

I was told that the snail reached the arc through persistence. I would often remind myself of that when I felt like I was on a treadmill, putting all my effort into accomplishing my dream, but seemingly getting nowhere.  

Like a play, all the preparation gets done behind the scenes. Yet the audience knows the show will start sometime because that’s exactly why they bought a ticket. 

We find ourselves on stage and in the audience simultaneously. Getting our money back isn’t an option.

And why would you want to? You’ve got a VIP ticket to the best show on earth, and it’s got your name all over it.

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Friday, 21 February 2014

Old Dog - New Tricks

I'm not one to shy away from a challenge.

It's for this reason that I've taken it upon myself to learn Mandarin.

Not only do I intend to learn Mandarin, but I'm putting aside the romanisation system known as pinyin and focusing on the traditional characters and way of reading them, known as Zhuyin.

Why would I put myself through such torture at the age of 30?

After all, you can't teach an old dog new tricks, right?

Wrong.

You can teach a dog new tricks if it's willing to learn them, regardless of its age.

Language has never been my strong point (the irony of a writer, I guess). I didn't start speaking till I was four years old. My parents said I made up my own language, and in my sleep I spoke in tongues. At school I hated studying French and German - opting to focus on German as I found it resembled English that little bit more.

So why have I decided to learn Mandarin, when I thought I had put all the 'language learning days' behind me?

I mean, I've always been drawn to the East. I've been a martial arts buff since I was knee-high. Bruce Lee has been my idol for as long as I can remember - even more so when I started to read his books and understand him as a philosopher, rather than a guy who only kicks ass on screen.

(Growing up, I knew my Nan shared the same birthday as Bruce Lee. I told her and she found it quite amusing and I found it cool. When she died in July, the date seemed somewhat familiar to me. And the reason was because she died on the same day as Bruce Lee, too. It may mean nothing, but to me it forges a connection to the guy who still inspires me to this day.)

Because of Mr Lee, I was drawn to Eastern thought and philosophy. I enjoyed watching documentaries about the East and even loved watching the Chinese cooking programs. I started drinking green tea before I was 10. And I've always found a bowl of plain rice really comforting!

So, I will ask again: why have I decided to learn Mandarin?

The answer can be reduced to four words.

I fell in love.

It's as simple as that.

Not only did I fall in love, but I fell in love with a girl who I met whilst living in a Buddhist Center and she was visiting the UK from . . . Taiwan.

Out of duty, she went back to her land far, far away and we intend to be with each other before this year is through.

So it is love that is my driving force. It is love that inspires me and eradicates all the fear and doubt I ever had about learning a new language. And the best thing is, I'm loving it. I'm truly enjoying the [slow] learning process that I've undertaken. I'm fascinated by Mandarin and how it all works. I'm fascinated by Taiwan and its history and its people.

And the more I learn the more I feel like I'm reminding myself of something which has always been within me.

I don't know about reincarnation or past lives (it makes sense if we consider that life has no beginning and no end) but it would explain my pull to the East.

As my girlfriend said, 'I feel like I've come to bring you home.'

And that's exactly why this old dog is wagging his tail.

(I know that most of you who are past your thirties will argue that 30 is young - but I'm afraid we in our thirties won't listen to you.)

www.gavinwhyte.co.uk