Tuesday, 9 May 2017

We Can't Force a Child to Enjoy Reading



I arrived late to fiction.

I was a kid with a lot of energy and a vivid imagination. (Something I still have!)

I wanted to be out in the woods, climbing trees, splashing through streams; finding frogs, birds’ nests and dead stuff. We would make dens and tree-swings and get cut up and bruised. We would spy on the older kids and get chased by farmers.

That’s what being a boy was all about; discovering the world by prodding it and pushing it, to see if prodded and pushed back.

And it did, loads of times.

It was called lesson learnt.

The buzz came from thinking you were going to die - truly believing it was the end - but then making it home in time for dinner. 

Books couldn’t come close to that.  

They couldn’t pump me full of adrenalin, get my heart racing and my forehead dripping. 

How lame it felt to turn a page, when my legs were still shaking from being chased by Rottweilers and German Shepherds!

You can’t force a child to read and expect them to enjoy it.

You can’t expect them to get lost in a book - which is where the pleasure of reading is found - whilst constantly asking them what is meant by this passage and that piece of dialogue; and all the while, hanging the threat of homework above their heads, which is to “Write an essay on the protagonist’s perception of the world she can’t see.”

“I hate books.”

“Me too.”

If kids don’t enjoy reading, it might be because they’re enjoying being a kid.

Now, I absolutely love reading because I gave myself space to read.

And that’s good for me, because folk tend to call the cops when they see an adult in a tree.

It’s a shame, really. 



Monday, 8 May 2017

300 Words a Day - #36: A Barnacle's Tale: Part 3 of 3


Continuing on from yesterday's post...


“What?” said Barry, aghast. “NO!” 

Bev let go with a smile.

She was never seen again by those on her rock. They mourned her absence - especially Barry, who was the last to see her, and couldn’t help blaming himself. The warnings of the tide were drilled into the young barnacles, with even more severity than before.

Let us turn our attention to Bev, for those remaining on the rock were mourning for themselves.

As she surrendered to the tide, smiling at Barry’s shocked expression, watching it getting smaller and fainter, she was actually becoming clearer and clearer to others she was not yet aware of.

“Who’s this?” she heard, and turned around instantly.

“Hello there, young one!” said a deep, penetrating voice. “Welcome!”

Bev literally could not believe what she was seeing. Barnacles, just like her, were not on rocks, but on a huge whale.

“Park yourself here,” said the barnacle with the deep voice. He seemed to be in charge. “Move up, everyone. Let’s create some space for her.”

Bev was still speechless. Her own imagination could never have conjured up such an experience.

“Well done for letting go and trusting!” said the barnacle in charge. “I’m Benny.”

“You’re Crazy… sorry, I mean, you’re Benny?”

“Guilty. And you are?”

“Bev.”

And all of the barnacles, including the whale, all chorused, “Hello, Bev!” Of course, the whale’s voice drowned out the rest.

“Oh, this is Winnie,” said Benny. “As you can see, she’s a whale, and a grand one at that.”

“She doesn’t mind us clinging to her?”

“Mind? It was her idea, wasn’t it Winnie?”

In a slow, operatic sort of voice, Winnie said, “It can be lonely swimming through the world’s oceans, all by oneself.”

And so, legend has it, that Bev went on to see the world. 



Sunday, 7 May 2017

300 Words a Day - #35: A Barnacle's Tale: Part 2 of 3


Continuing on from yesterday's post...


“Cope better?” said Bev the barnacle. “And how do you propose I do that?”

“Just… copy me,” said Barry. “You don’t hear me fantasizing about being swept away by the tide.” 

“That’s because you’re afraid!”

“Afraid?! I’m not scared to let go! It’s just that we’re not supposed to, that’s all. I prefer to follow the rules, unlike some folk.”

“Haven’t you heard the rumors, though?”

“What, that trusting the tide leads to happiness? Of course I’ve heard them. Everyone has. But I’ve already told you, it means saying goodbye to all that we know.”

“You mean this rock?”

“Yes, I mean this rock. Our rock. We know this rock and it knows us.”

Both of them were quiet for sometime, then Bev said, “You said those who have let go have never been seen again, but there was one, wasn't there?”

“You mean Crazy Benny? Yeah, okay, good luck trusting him. The tide went to his head.”

“But he said-“

“I know what he said. My grandpa’s told me all about him. He was there, when he came back.”

“Well, wasn’t Benny happy?” said Bev.

“He was as crazy as a crab, my grandpa said. He said Crazy Benny was telling everyone how the tide takes you where you need to go, just as long as you’re willing to let go first. Trust! That’s what he kept on saying. Trust! Trust! Hah! Fool. They pushed him off the rock. They couldn’t stand him talking such nonsense.”

“Maybe that’s why nobody ever comes back, because persuading others to trust the tide, when we’ve been conditioned not to, is pointless.”

“They tell us that stuff for our own good.”

Bev couldn’t fight the impulse to let go. She had to do it. 

It was now or never. 

“Goodbye, Barry,” she said.



The final part will be here tomorrow



Saturday, 6 May 2017

300 Words a Day - #34: A Barnacle's Tale - Part 1 of 3



Yesterday, I mentioned the importance of flowing with life, and finished off using the analogy of a barnacle. (A barnacle being an arthropod that clings to rocks, resisting the tide.) 

I remember reading a tale about a barnacle, but I can’t remember whereabouts I read it. 

I will try and write one here. (If you know of such a tale, please let me know).

***


So the story goes that a group of barnacles were clinging to a rock.

All the barnacles were conditioned from a young age to resist the tide. No matter how hard life got, one was never to let go and be swept away.

“Those that get swept away are never seen again!” said a melodramatic barnacle. 

Let’s call him Barry.

“But there has to be more to life than clinging to this rock,” said another barnacle. We’ll call her Bev. Her thinking set her apart from the rest. “Day in, day out, all we do is cling. What if there’s more?”

“More?” said Barry. “What do you mean more?”

“Well, suppose all those who have let go and trusted where the tide took them-”

“Now stop that talk about the tide! If the elders hear you they’ll-“

“I wasn’t saying anything bad... I was just going to say, what if those who have let go are not only okay but are actually having an amazing time? What if they’ve found other rocks?”

“You talk daft!”

“What if they’re doing what every barnacle dreams of?”

“And what exactly might that be?”

“Well… don’t you want to be free?”

“I am free… free to roam on our rock!”

“No, I mean free with the tide; for all the stress and the pressure to vanish.”

“You just need to learn how to cope better.”

Bev stared at Barry, angrily. 


To be continued tomorrow...





Friday, 5 May 2017

300 Words a Day - #33: Don't be a Barnacle



Our family and friends think they know what’s best for us, just as we think we know what’s best for them.

We willingly advise those of whom we care for, with the hope of steering them to safety.

But what happens when they shock us by doing something that alters our perception of them?

Do we get offended because our preconceived expectations and assumptions of who we thought they were, now prove to be useless? Do we feel foolish, now?

When they decide to live a life they want to live, as apposed to the life we expect and want them to live, do we feel offended because we thought we had them down to a tee? 

And now all of a sudden they’ve changed, and it is us that are left feeling confused and uncertain about life. Furthermore, where we stand in relation to this person - who we thought we knew so well - is now unclear.

Many of us don’t like change. It’s the unknown that bothers us. Whereas certainty can make us feel comfortable and cozy.

It can be a shock to the system when others don’t like change in your life because of how it makes them feel.

True colors can begin to seep through.

Or maybe they say they’re worried about you because they think you’re making a wrong move.

What to do?

Are you going to change your mind and deny yourself the chance to truly live the life you want to live? 

Guilt can be overbearing.

Or are you going to stick to what your deeper self is telling you; that you need to make this move because this is the way life is taking you?  

We put ourselves under enormous amounts of pressure when we resist the flow of life.



Thursday, 4 May 2017

300 Words a Day - #32: The Path of Least Resistance



My family and friends thought I was crazy.

They really did.

Breaking the news to them was harder than I thought it would be.

The majority of them reacted in a way that was the very antithesis of supportive.

They couldn’t understand why I had suddenly decided to turn my back on the very thing I had been working towards, for nearly a decade.

You don’t do that. 

But if it feels right, then you have to.

You really do.

Because if you don’t you are ignoring the roadsigns that you are on the wrong route.

And the longer you leave it, the harder it will be to turn the wheel.

I’ve always been one for trusting my feelings, and I advise others to practice doing the same thing.

Our feelings are like an inner sat-nav, one that we were born with in our gut; telling us to turn left, go straight ahead, stop here a while and then carry on at a reasonable pace.

They seem to know what’s best for us.

Don’t ask me how… 

Perhaps it’s nudges from something that’s greater than us. Some might say the divine, God, the universe… I’m not going to surmise. All I can go on is my own experience, and what I’ve found is that when I follow and trust my feelings, they guide me, like water, along the path of least resistance.

For when I resist, I suffer.

So my feelings guide me along the path that contains more of the things I’m less likely to resist, thereby manifesting more positive feelings, such as gratitude and a sense that I’m on the right track and “in tune” with what is.

Sometimes, though, following our feelings goes against the advice from those who think they know what’s best for us.



Wednesday, 3 May 2017

300 Words a Day - #31: Be Honest with Yourself

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I’m aware I’m repeating myself here, but it was only when my dream came true did I realize I no longer wanted it.

Nobody could’ve changed my mind when I was on my quest. 

Getting a recording contract was my mission.

If somebody had’ve said, “What if you don’t actually want it?” I sincerely wouldn’t have been able to compute what they were saying.

The thought of not wanting it didn’t enter the equation. 

Why would it?

The thought of failing entered my mind loads of times, but that was through fear.

A thought that doubted why I wanted the dream to become a reality would’ve doubted everything I lived for, would’ve doubted the complete identity I had conjured up.

Talk about fear!

No, I never doubted my goal because I enjoyed making music too much.

So when the dream came true and we started gigging around the UK, and I found myself slipping further and further into a dark place, I knew something wasn’t right.

That question I had never asked needed to be asked.

One day, whilst sitting in my car, I asked myself, “What would it feel like, right now, if I stopped making music?”

I shut my eyes and pretended for about ten seconds how that would feel. 

It was as if an elephant had been lifted off of my chest and shoulders.

I took a deep breath and laughed. 

How light I felt!

I couldn’t believe it.

For nine years I had been allowing that elephant to grow, and when you’re feeding something every day, just like in Roald Dahl’s Esio Trot, you don’t see (or in my case, feel) the difference. 

Such a deep pit I had dug for myself.

Now I had to climb out, but nobody was willing to lend a ladder.